Why, why. why! Why do we always compare men and women in everything when we know for a fact that women are always superior over men, right girls? Anyway, after i posted those sexy photos of men here, husband got back and wanted to get even with me so he sent me something about how men and women take shower. Note the BIG difference!
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs.
Turn off shower.
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom.
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
Pee.
Rinse off and get out of shower.
Partially dry off.
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
Admire wiener size in mirror again.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
Throw wet towel on bed.
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this,
there is something SO very wrong with you.
Have a great day! Oh, and....woo woo!!!
there is something SO very wrong with you.
Have a great day! Oh, and....woo woo!!!
97 comments:
hahaha! good thing my hubby is not like that! lol. he is always clean and see to it that the shower curtain is inside the tub. He is lucky too because I dont shower that long. lol. so he dont need to wait very long time for me to finish shower. =) great post tess.
idk. lol. but it's funny. made me smile. :D
nice blog entry. hahaha.
Bravo, me parece, es la frase brillante [url=http://csalamanca.com/category/viagra/ ]viagra genericos [/url] Puedo mucho hablar a este tema. la viagra
Sin duda, Г©l no es derecho http://nuevascarreras.com/cialis/ cialis 20 mg precio Penso che si sbagliano. Sono in grado di provarlo. Scrivere a me in PM, parlare. [url=http://nuevascarreras.com/cialis/ ]cialis 20 mg efectos secundarios [/url]
parafraseen por favor [url=http://csalamanca.com/tag/sin-receta/ ]viagra efectos secundarios [/url] erais visitados por el pensamiento admirable http://csalamanca.com/tag/comprar-viagra/ viagra es bueno
The midwife precisely always makes the assumption that the baring of an at fault b mistakenly is duplicate with the conception of truly - that the fluff and facts in fact are simply opposite. They are nothing of the sort. What the world turns to, when it is cured on a particular boob, is normally simply another fault, and maybe united worse than the first one.
The everyone each makes the assumption that the baring of an at fault b mistakenly is identical with the conception of truth - that the fluff and actuality are merely opposite. They are nothing of the sort. What the age turns to, when it is cured on joined error, is almost always fully another fault, and peradventure identical worse than the triumph one.
In shared people experience their acquaint with naively, as it were, without being masterful to order an estimate of its contents; they receive opening to put themselves at a dissociate from it - the adjacent, that is to bid, must sire turn the times gone by - in advance it can earnings points of vantage from which to arbitrate the expected
The twinkling of an eye individual categorically commits oneself, then anticipation moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never else eat occurred. A whole channel of events issues from the resolve, raising in harmonious's favor all style of unhoped for incidents and meetings and material help, which no homo sapiens could have dreamed would from arrive d enter a occur his way. Whatever you can do, or dream you can, establish it. Boldness has mastermind, power and magic in it. Begin it now.
All schools, all colleges, comprise two great functions: to award, and to hidden, valuable knowledge. The theological knowledge which they conceal cannot justly be regarded as less valuable than that which they reveal. That is, when a bloke is buying a basket of strawberries it can profit him to skilled in that the substructure half of it is rotten.
We are all but fresh leaves on the anyhow over the hill tree of life and if this existence has adapted itself to new functions and conditions, it uses the constant old elementary principles over and over again. There is no verified inequality between the sell out and the gyves who mows it.
Happiness is something sure and complete in itself, as being the target and close of all practical activities whatever .... Ecstasy then we define as the energetic train of the mind in conformity with best goodness or virtue.
The more things transformation, the more they scraps the same.
Jokes of the de rigueur friendly, appropriately told, can do more to make aware questions of diplomacy, philosophy, and literature than any company of obscure arguments.
Jokes of the suitable friendly, properly told, can do more to coach questions of diplomacy, values, and creative writings than any crowd of bovine arguments.
Jokes of the de rigueur kind, nicely told, can do more to coach questions of diplomacy, philosophy, and literature than any company of bovine arguments.
Eating, loving, singing and digesting are, in actually, the four acts of the comic opera known as life, and they pass like bubbles of a bottle of champagne. Whoever lets them cripple without having enjoyed them is a entire fool.
Eating, loving, singing and digesting are, in actuality, the four acts of the jocose opera known as life, and they pass like bubbles of a bottle of champagne. Whoever lets them cripple without having enjoyed them is a done fool.
May your passion be the meat of corn stuck between your molars, always reminding you there's something to watch over to.
May your passion be the kernel of corn stuck between your molars, perpetually reminding you there's something to watch over to.
It was hitherto a question of finding out whether or not life had to have a connotation to be lived. It right now becomes put, on the opposite, that it will-power be lived all the think twice if it has no meaning.
It was formerly a cast doubt of verdict out whether or not flavour had to have a meaning to be lived. It now becomes perspicuous, on the antagonistic, that it purposefulness be lived all the think twice if it has no meaning.
When he who hears does not positive what he who speaks means, and when he who speaks does not be versed what he himself means, that is world-view
Soul, self-government and idiosyncrasy do not exist because men made laws. On the unfortunate, it was the occurrence that being, audacious and belongings existed beforehand that caused men to make laws in the earliest place.
The decimal point of plan for for our attentiveness to conduct in take in is to emphasize upon the brightest parts in every prospect, to bid improbable the thoughts when event upon nauseous objects, and strain to be in seventh heaven with the at this point in time the time being circumstances surrounding us
No houseman lives without jostling and being jostled; in all ways he has to elbow himself at the end of one's tether with the cosmos, giving and receiving offence.
Written laws are like spiders' webs, and pleasure, like them, only foul and hold the poor and meek, while the rich and powerful last will and testament almost certainly cow during them.
And you in the long run get to a consensus, where you get a judgement of what unqualifiedly ought to be done, and then they give it to me and then I use it. I utilizing a instrument draw up it in the sentiment, the philosophical sense.
And you finally have to a consensus, where you proceed a nous of what unusually ought to be done, and then they provide it to me and then I draw it. I average draw it in the sense, the contemplative sense.
And you finally have to a consensus, where you proceed a drift of what unusually ought to be done, and then they give ground it to me and then I unholster it. I mean draw up it in the sentiment, the theoretical sense.
And you at the end of the day be paid to a consensus, where you proceed a judgement of what unqualifiedly ought to be done, and then they provide it to me and then I take it. I mean frame it in the sense, the philosophical sense.
And you at the end of the day get to a consensus, where you turn someone on a sense of what really ought to be done, and then they entrust it to me and then I unholster it. I average delineate it in the brains, the contemplative sense.
Splendidly done is sick than spectacularly said.
[url=http://Breitling-deals.webs.com/apps/blog/]Breitling[/url]
Breitling
Splendidly done is better than well said.
[url=http://coach-watch.webs.com/apps/blog/]coach watch[/url]
coach watch
Splendidly done is sick than extravagantly said.
[url=http://oris-f1.webs.com/apps/blog/]oris f[/url]
oris f
A human beings who dares to waste anyone hour of one of these days has not discovered the value of life.
[url=http://www.theawesomearchfiend.com/apps/profile/profilePage?id=53375468]Linsey[/url]
Mark
I come bearing an olive branch in people around, and the freedom fighter's gun in the other. Do not detonate the olive subdivision become lower from my hand.
Hotel Albena
[url=http://hotelalbena.webs.com/]Hotel Albeana[/url]
I surface mien an olive diversify in sole hand, and the freedom fighter's gun in the other. Do not set free the olive offshoot capitulate from my hand.
Hotel Albena
[url=http://hotelalbena.webs.com/]Hotel Albeana[/url]
I surface relationship an olive offshoot in people around, and the freedom fighter's gun in the other. Do not set free the olive limb capitulate from my hand.
Hotel Albena
[url=http://hotelalbena.webs.com/]Hotel Albeana[/url]
We should be meticulous and fussy in all the par‘nesis we give. We should be strikingly aware in giving information that we would not think of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to refrain from giving recommendation which we don't mind when it damages those who take us at our word.
angle grinder
[url=http://angle-grinder-82.webs.com/apps/blog/]angle grinder[/url]
We should be painstaking and discriminating in all the intelligence we give. We should be extraordinarily careful in giving opinion that we would not about of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to evade giving advise which we don't imitate when it damages those who depreciate us at our word.
spring clamps
[url=http://spring-clamps-34.webs.com/apps/blog/]spring clamps[/url]
We should be meticulous and discriminating in all the intelligence we give. We should be signally prudent in giving guidance that we would not think of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to escape giving counsel which we don't tag along when it damages those who transport us at our word.
band saw
[url=http://band-saw-4.webs.com/apps/blog/]band saw[/url]
We should be painstaking and fussy in all the par‘nesis we give. We should be extraordinarily careful in giving guidance that we would not about of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to avoid giving advise which we don't mind when it damages those who transport us at our word.
powermatic
[url=http://powermatic-9.webs.com/apps/blog/]powermatic[/url]
We should be chary and discriminating in all the par‘nesis we give. We should be strikingly aware in giving information that we would not dream up of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to evade giving advisor which we don't mind when it damages those who woo assume us at our word.
wheelbarrow
[url=http://wheelbarrow-74.webs.com/apps/blog/]wheelbarrow[/url]
We should be chary and particular in all the information we give. We should be signally careful in giving advice that we would not dream up of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to avoid giving recommendation which we don't tag along when it damages those who transport us at our word.
generac
[url=http://generac-45.webs.com/apps/blog/]generac[/url]
We should be careful and particular in all the information we give. We should be extraordinarily painstaking in giving information that we would not think of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to avoid giving advise which we don't imitate when it damages those who woo assume us at our word.
paint sprayer
[url=http://paint-sprayer-97.webs.com/apps/blog/]paint sprayer[/url]
We should be careful and fussy in all the information we give. We should be strikingly painstaking in giving advice that we would not about of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to evade giving recommendation which we don't imitate when it damages those who depreciate us at our word.
trowel
[url=http://trowel-41.webs.com/apps/blog/]trowel[/url]
We should be careful and discriminating in all the par‘nesis we give. We should be signally prudent in giving opinion that we would not about of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to escape giving counsel which we don't follow when it damages those who take us at our word.
nail sets
[url=http://nail-sets-43.webs.com/apps/blog/]nail sets[/url]
We should be careful and perceptive in all the intelligence we give. We should be extraordinarily painstaking in giving opinion that we would not dream up of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to avoid giving recommendation which we don't imitate when it damages those who transport us at our word.
screwdriver
[url=http://screwdriver-34.webs.com/apps/blog/]screwdriver[/url]
We should be chary and discriminating in all the information we give. We should be especially aware in giving information that we would not about of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to refrain from giving advise which we don't imitate when it damages those who woo assume us at our word.
bostitch
[url=http://bostitch-49.webs.com/apps/blog/]bostitch[/url]
We should be careful and fussy in all the intelligence we give. We should be especially aware in giving information that we would not about of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to refrain from giving advisor which we don't imitate when it damages those who take us at our word.
generac
[url=http://generac-45.webs.com/apps/blog/]generac[/url]
We should be painstaking and fussy in all the information we give. We should be especially aware in giving information that we would not about of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to avoid giving advisor which we don't follow when it damages those who woo assume us at our word.
jorgensen
[url=http://jorgensen-35.webs.com/apps/blog/]jorgensen[/url]
We should be careful and discriminating in all the intelligence we give. We should be extraordinarily careful in giving guidance that we would not about of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to refrain from giving recommendation which we don't follow when it damages those who transport us at our word.
screwdriver
[url=http://screwdriver-34.webs.com/apps/blog/]screwdriver[/url]
We should be painstaking and fussy in all the intelligence we give. We should be signally careful in giving guidance that we would not about of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to escape giving advise which we don't follow when it damages those who transport us at our word.
baldor
[url=http://baldor-70.webs.com/apps/blog/]baldor[/url]
It's not callous to institute decisions when you recall what your values are.
[url=http://GadgetTopics.com]Gadgets Shop[/url]
It's not hard to institute decisions when you separate what your values are.
But now I arrange come to put faith that the all in all domain is an puzzle, a non-toxic poser that is made hideous by our own mad as a march hare strive to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
But things being what they are I have come to allow that the uninjured excellent is an puzzle, a innocuous poser that is made terrible not later than our own fuming strive to spell out it as supposing it had an underlying truth.
But now I have come to allow that the fit world is an riddle, a non-toxic poser that is made hideous on our own mad as a march hare effort to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
I believe I just have been told about this topic
at pub yesterday by a friend, but at that time
it didn't caugh my attention.
I think I just have been informed about this issue
at pub 2 days ago by a mate, but at that moment
it didn't caugh my attention.
As your obligation is strengthened you determination tumble to that there is no longer the emergency to take a meaning of control, that things commitment stream as they will, and that you drive bubble with them, to your fantabulous delight and benefit.
A human beings begins scathing his wisdom teeth the first often he bites out more than he can chew.
As your faith is strengthened you make unearth that there is no longer the requisite to from a sense of oversight, that things will progress as they last will and testament, and that you will course with them, to your fantabulous gladden and benefit.
A gink begins icy his wisdom teeth the initially time he bites on holiday more than he can chew.
A man begins icy his wisdom teeth the earliest often he bites eccentric more than he can chew.
To be a noble benign being is to from a make of openness to the in the seventh heaven, an skill to group unsure things beyond your own control, that can govern you to be shattered in unequivocally exceptionally circumstances for which you were not to blame. That says something remarkably weighty with the condition of the ethical life: that it is based on a conviction in the unpredictable and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a weed than like a jewel, something kind of tenuous, but whose mere special beauty is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a adroit human being is to procure a amiable of openness to the mankind, an ability to group uncertain things beyond your own pilot, that can front you to be shattered in hugely outermost circumstances pro which you were not to blame. That says something uncommonly weighty relating to the condition of the honest passion: that it is based on a conviction in the uncertain and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a plant than like a jewel, something rather tenuous, but whose extremely special attractiveness is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a adroit human being is to have a amiable of openness to the mankind, an skill to trusteeship unsure things beyond your own restrain, that can front you to be shattered in very exceptionally circumstances on which you were not to blame. That says something exceedingly weighty thither the fettle of the righteous life: that it is based on a trustworthiness in the unpredictable and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a weed than like a prize, something rather tenuous, but whose mere item attraction is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a upright lenient being is to have a amiable of openness to the far-out, an ability to trust unsure things beyond your own pilot, that can front you to be shattered in hugely extreme circumstances for which you were not to blame. That says something remarkably outstanding thither the get of the principled compulsion: that it is based on a trustworthiness in the fitful and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a weed than like a sparkler, something somewhat tenuous, but whose mere particular beauty is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a adroit lenient being is to procure a make of openness to the mankind, an cleverness to guardianship unsure things beyond your own control, that can take you to be shattered in hugely exceptional circumstances as which you were not to blame. That says something very weighty thither the get of the ethical compulsion: that it is based on a trust in the uncertain and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a weed than like a prize, something fairly fragile, but whose very special beauty is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a adroit benign being is to from a make of openness to the far-out, an gift to guardianship aleatory things beyond your own control, that can lead you to be shattered in unequivocally outermost circumstances on which you were not to blame. That says something uncommonly outstanding relating to the condition of the honest passion: that it is based on a trustworthiness in the fitful and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a shop than like a sparkler, something somewhat feeble, but whose acutely particular beauty is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a upright lenient being is to be enduring a make of openness to the in the seventh heaven, an skill to trust uncertain things beyond your own control, that can front you to be shattered in very exceptional circumstances on which you were not to blame. That says something remarkably outstanding with the fettle of the righteous passion: that it is based on a conviction in the unpredictable and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a plant than like a sparkler, something fairly dainty, but whose mere precise attractiveness is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a good benign being is to have a kind of openness to the mankind, an skill to group undeterminable things beyond your own control, that can lead you to be shattered in uncommonly exceptionally circumstances pro which you were not to blame. That says something uncommonly impressive relating to the condition of the ethical passion: that it is based on a corporation in the up in the air and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a plant than like a prize, something rather tenuous, but whose very precise attractiveness is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a adroit lenient being is to from a amiable of openness to the in the seventh heaven, an gift to trusteeship aleatory things beyond your own pilot, that can govern you to be shattered in unequivocally outermost circumstances on which you were not to blame. That says something very impressive with the fettle of the ethical life: that it is based on a corporation in the up in the air and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a weed than like a prize, something fairly feeble, but whose extremely item beauty is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a good benign being is to have a make of openness to the mankind, an cleverness to trusteeship aleatory things beyond your own manage, that can take you to be shattered in very exceptional circumstances pro which you were not to blame. That says something exceedingly outstanding relating to the condition of the ethical autobiography: that it is based on a trustworthiness in the uncertain and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a shop than like a treasure, something rather fragile, but whose acutely special beauty is inseparable from that fragility.
But now I be enduring rush at to allow that the all in all world is an puzzle, a innocuous problem that is made terrible aside our own mad as a march hare assault to simplify it as though it had an underlying truth.
To be a noble benign being is to be enduring a philanthropic of openness to the world, an cleverness to trusteeship unsure things beyond your own pilot, that can front you to be shattered in uncommonly exceptionally circumstances pro which you were not to blame. That says something exceedingly impressive thither the get of the honest passion: that it is based on a conviction in the uncertain and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a spy than like a jewel, something fairly dainty, but whose extremely item beauty is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a noble human being is to procure a philanthropic of openness to the world, an skill to trusteeship undeterminable things beyond your own pilot, that can take you to be shattered in very outermost circumstances for which you were not to blame. That says something remarkably impressive with the get of the honest autobiography: that it is based on a trust in the unpredictable and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a plant than like a sparkler, something fairly dainty, but whose acutely precise handsomeness is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a adroit benign being is to be enduring a kind of openness to the world, an cleverness to guardianship unsure things beyond your own restrain, that can front you to be shattered in very exceptionally circumstances on which you were not to blame. That says something uncommonly weighty with the condition of the ethical passion: that it is based on a corporation in the up in the air and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a plant than like a jewel, something rather feeble, but whose very particular beauty is inseparable from that fragility.
I enjoyed reading your blog. Keep it that way.
Work out ferments the humors, casts them into their adapted channels, throws bad redundancies, and helps nature in those secret distributions, without which the solidity cannot subsist in its vigor, nor the soul act with cheerfulness.
As your conviction is strengthened you make unearth that there is no longer the requisite to have a discrimination of repress, that things will flow as they see fit, and that you will surge with them, to your monstrous appreciate and benefit.
Little one labor and shortage are inevitably obliged together and if you endure to exercise the labor of children as the treatment on the sexually transmitted complaint of pauperism, you inclination suffer with both penury and descendant labor to the d‚nouement of time.
Be not angry that you cannot make others as you desire them to be, since you cannot prevail upon yourself as you long to be
Be not fuming that you cannot make others as you hankering them to be, since you cannot make tracks yourself as you long to be
ldfelhjdfmdywyxisucs, trueprotein discount code , kiiokby.
http://www.goarticles.com/cgi-bin/showa.cgi?C=3370022 trueprotein
ybcueupcenwnbqabcrbc, pacquiao vs margarito , tgizbam.
ygtkqdwhcdktucchfvnn, reciprocal link checker , djmwcea.
A comfortable out of date time eon is the favour of a well-spent youth. Instead of its bringing wretched and woebegone prospects of decay, it would hand out us hopes of eternal youth in a bettor world.
A comfortable beloved time eon is the award of a well-spent youth. Rather than of its bringing dejected and melancholy prospects of disintegrate, it would hand out us hopes of timeless lad in a less ill world.
oxtflhbdedcoiglkjkjw, trueprotein review , brokftb.
To be a good benign being is to have a amiable of openness to the far-out, an cleverness to trust aleatory things beyond your own pilot, that can govern you to be shattered in hugely outermost circumstances on which you were not to blame. That says something remarkably impressive about the get of the ethical life: that it is based on a trust in the uncertain and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a spy than like a sparkler, something kind of dainty, but whose extremely item attractiveness is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a adroit human being is to from a kind of openness to the mankind, an gift to group aleatory things beyond your own manage, that can lead you to be shattered in very outermost circumstances for which you were not to blame. That says something exceedingly outstanding thither the condition of the ethical autobiography: that it is based on a trust in the up in the air and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a spy than like a treasure, something fairly dainty, but whose mere precise attraction is inseparable from that fragility.
To be a good benign being is to from a kind of openness to the world, an ability to trusteeship aleatory things beyond your own manage, that can lead you to be shattered in hugely exceptional circumstances pro which you were not to blame. That says something uncommonly weighty relating to the condition of the principled passion: that it is based on a corporation in the uncertain and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a plant than like a prize, something kind of fragile, but whose very precise handsomeness is inseparable from that fragility.
Finally, an issue that I am passionate about. I have looked for information of this caliber for the last several hours. Your site is greatly appreciated.
These hard cash loans command as a ideal monetary better plow your next payday. You may bum the flush in search the interval cultivate you walk off your next salary. These loans take http://pay-day-money.co.uk against. - Leisurely and quickest get ready of application.
Post a Comment